I have now mastered the snowboard. There isn't much to be said about it except that I spent more time on my back or buckling the straps to my feet or falling off the ski lift than on the slope. On the bunny slope, I was joined by a handful of kids and their parents who eventually noticed my efforts and gave me cheerful shouts of "Next time!" and "Keep fighting!" I could never seem to master the get-up after a fall withouth sliding forward, and lying on my back, I would have to roll over and helicopter the board over my head, at which point int time I could successfully push up and off the ground. At final tally, I have a bruise at the back of my head from hittng the ground too violently in a turn, a sore coccyx, and muscles that are likely to stiffen as I drop off to sleep.
After I had strapped the board to my feet and sprawled across the snow in an unsuccessful attempt to stand, my father hovered around me anxiously, concerned at my many stumbles and insisted I change to the pair of skis in the car, seeing as I am more adept at handling their turns. Though he said no such thing, I gather he thought I was having no fun at all and wished to spare me the pain. His well intentions, however, were unnecessary. It was gnarly, dude, but totally radical. Hang the tumbles! Falling is the lifeblood of success.